where my trust is without borders

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders. 

Let me walk upon the waters. Wherever you would call me. 

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander.
 
And my faith will be made stronger, in the presence of my Savior. 

***************************************************************** 
this song is my life anthem right now. 

i sing it literally every single day. 

these words are constantly running through my mind and heart.  

2 years ago i left everything to follow the call of God. 

i moved from beautiful Colorado to (what i thought was) barren Alabama.  

i left the security of family, a home, a job, being close to finishing my Associate's degree, my friends, my church, my mountains- everything. 

Birmingham didn't look right. It didn't feel right. But I knew it was where I was called. 

So one day, I packed up my car with my belongings, and drove across the country, 1300 miles, alone. Not knowing what to expect. Not knowing where my money for the year was coming from. Not knowing the people I would encounter. Expecting challenges and hardships and pain. Leaving all sense of security at what used to be home. 

leaving Colorado to move to Birmingham and to be a part of Highlands College and Church of the Highlands was probably the best decision I have ever made. 

Alabama has become home. 

my life has radically and completely changed as I encountered Jesus in ways I had never thought possible. i am new person because of my years here. 

i graduate Highlands College in 2 weeks. 

the feeling is surreal. 

i have two more weeks with some of the greatest people i have ever known. 

my family. 

some of us are staying for 3rd year internships. 

one of us is moving to St. Louis to pursue a HUGE God-given opportunity. 

some of us are going to California. 

some to Florida. 

one of us is going to India. 

some Africa. 

one of us has dreams of Australia. 

our family over the next year or so will be spreading across the globe. 

there are so many unknowns. 

its requiring A LOT of trust in the voice, heart, plans, and peace of God.  

God's plans are so much bigger than anything we could ever imagine. 

its faith to not give up on dreams, even when they seem too big or too far away. 

its faith to trust in what the Lord has spoken and is speaking. 

***********************************************************************************
here's an update on my journey and where i am headed. 

up until two weeks ago, i hadn't the slightest clue what my next step was. 

two weeks ago, we went to Jacksonville, Florida, for the ARC Conference. 

ARC (Association of Related Churches) is a church planting organization that plants one church every 4 days and equips pastors to launch churches and bring their God given dreams and visions to reality. 

as interns, we had the honor of serving these pastors for a week so that they could be poured into, encouraged, and built up. 

i wasn't going to go to ARC, but after talking to Pastor Hayes, he strongly encouraged me to make the investment, and spend a hundred dollars to go. 

i reluctantly signed up and paid the fees. 

i am so thankful i went. 

it was the absolute best week for me. 

i came away so encouraged and full. 

i got to hear from and be around the greatest leaders in the world. 

we're talking about people like...

Brian Houston. Christine Caine. Larry Stockstill. Rick Warren. John and Lisa Bevere. Phillip and Holly Wagner. Willie George. Lori Champion. Chris Hodges. And countless more. 

{here's a free nugget: the #1 thing that stuck with me. Christine Caine said "It is better to be marked by God than marketed by men."} 

i had a couple opportunities come up during the week. 

i had an interview for what looks like a dream job. in Texas. 

but i have no peace about it. 

and then California crossed my path. 

i've never thought about or considered the possibility of California. until now. 

before the actual conference started, there were breakout app sessions. 

i went to the ARC Women app session. 

i was sitting with one of our pastor's wives, Mrs. Debbie. 

then i saw this lady walk in, and my spirit jumped. it was one of those moments where my heart screamed "I HAVE TO KNOW YOU." 

well, i ignored it and didn't talk to her, cause i didn't want to sound weird. 

every time i saw her over the next 4 days, the same thing would happen. 

the last day, when everything was over, i was sitting there waiting for our intern clean up meeting to start with my good friend Ashley. i told her what happened and pointed the woman out to her. she told me i was dumb, and needed to obey the Holy Spirit and go make a connection with her. we argued for 10 minutes and i finally went. 

i confidently introduced myself, told her what happened, asked if she could tell me about herself, her ministry, and her experience in women's ministry- we talked for about 15 minutes. she asked me how i got to Highlands. what my story was. what my ministry calling is. what my vision and heart for women's ministry is (which we have the same heart and vision for). she encouraged me, poured into me- spiritually and practically. through talking i found out that she and her husband planted a church in Orange County, California, that launched 7 months ago. 

i asked if they needed help in their church. she said yes- they need help with girls discipleship. (how perfect). and that i was welcome to come visit any time. to pray about it and talk to my spiritual authority and see what my next step would be. (in much more words on both sides...this is the small, condensed version). 

she asked me if i believed Birmingham and Highlands were where i am supposed to be planted, and i had no hesitation or doubts is saying "no". 

i love Birmingham. i love Highlands. but its not where i am supposed to plant myself.

the pastor who is responsible for getting me to Birmingham- Pastor Layne- is always telling us to go after the who, and not the what- even if it means moving from a place like Disney World to a place like Vision Land- to follow the cloud and the who. 

i want to follow this cloud. 

i can't explain the Holy Spirit connection i felt with this pastor. it doesn't make sense. 

i have this dream job available in Texas, but no peace with it. 

however, i would move to California tomorrow just to serve under their leadership. 

i would be willing to work two jobs, just to support myself to live in California, so I could serve in their church. 

having looked at the church website and listened to many messages, i have already fallen in love with the church and haven't even been. it looks PHENOMENAL. everything they do is so intentional, so Biblically based, so real, so vision focused- its amazing. 

i came home. let my heart stir. prayed on what God was speaking and showing me. 

and talked to Pastor Hayes. (our ministry coordinator and my spiritual authority). 

he told me that from everything i communicated, i needed to pack my bags and go out for a visit as soon as i possibly could. 

i went to sports that day and looking at airline tickets, i stumbled upon a round trip ticket for $170 to San Diego. (completely Jesus providing for me). 

i texted Pastor Meghan. worked out the dates, and booked my ticket. 

i'm going to California. alone. in 4 weeks. 

this is a huge leap of faith. 

its insane, really. not normal. 

i don't do things like this, UNLESS i know that its what the Holy Spirit is leading me to do. 

and i know, with no doubt, that this is what i am supposed to do. 

there's a lot of uncertainty, but i am certain this is the step God is lighting my path to take. 

is it hard? yes. 

does it require sacrifice? yes. obedience always does. 

is it scary? yes. 

is it perhaps blind faith? completely. 

am i excited? beyond excited. 

this is a crazy, awesome, Jesus adventure. 

once again, i'm following the voice of the Lord where He is leading me- even though it is taking me 2,000 miles from home. 

its sacrifice. 

my family thinks i'm insane. 

my mother hasn't spoken to me in 8 days. 

i have less money in my car savings account. 

i am facing my fear of flying again (FOR A 7 HOUR FLIGHT. pray for me.) 

but i have perfect peace. the kind that comes from the Lord and following Him. the kind that surpasses all human understanding. 

i am honored that He has chosen me to walk this path, and i cannot wait to see what plays out and comes from this. 

its a risk. but why not take risks?

God did not save me to tame me. 

i want to live a dangerous life. a life of faith. and faith is a risk. 

after

life is not a fairytale. it is a battleground.

we all have thoughts similar to....

after i graduate and have my degree and a career, then I'll be happy...

after i get married, I'll finally feel whole and not alone...

after i have a baby, my life will feel fulfilled...

BUT WHAT ABOUT RIGHT NOW?

life is a process. it is not an event.

we must learn to embrace the process and live in a way that takes each day at a time.

yes, its okay to make goals, but we shouldn't live with our head in the clouds in some far off land where our life seems "perfect".

we will never be effective for the Kingdom if we're lost in the days to come.

you can't see your next step if your eyes are focused on a mile away. focus on the next step.

i'm just as guilty as this as the next person. if i could skip the next 20 years and be 40 years old, with a husband, three kids, a ministry, a couple books published and influence in the women's ministry world- i would do it in a heartbeat.

but if i were to skip the next 20 years- think of how much I would miss out on.

relationships.

memories.

travels.

small miracles in daily life that the Lord has planned.

falling in love.

my wedding.

the birth of my children.

their first steps, words, kindergarten graduations...

the first letter saying my book was accepted for publication.

there is so much i would miss out on if i were to skip the next twenty years, just so i could be in my "ideal, perfect" world.

i chose today, to embrace today. to embrace tomorrow. to embrace the season i am in right now.

even though i don't know what is next. even though i don't know who my husband is. even though i don't know where i'm going to get placed in a church and what i will be doing there. even though i still have to write the books that will be published one day.

i will not get so distracted with after that i forget about now. 

i make a new commitment to enjoy the moments.

i want to change the world. but first i must learn to see the beauty in moments. how will i ever change the world if i can't change moments?

life is beautiful. each moments counts.

if life is a battleground, we must live in the moment, aware of our surroundings.

its time to fight. 
 
Ephesians 5:15 - "Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise,  making the most of every opportunity (moment), because the days are evil."

*this post was part of a community of writers that take 5 minutes every Friday to write, just for the love of writing. you can join in at www.lisajobaker.com*

neither do i condemn you. go and sin no more.

this is a story about Jesus, lepers, prostitutes and expensive perfume. 

you might be thinking- "what do all these things have to do with each other?"

a lot. they have a lot in common. and His name is Jesus.

a few days before Jesus was going to die, we find Him hanging out at His friend Simon's house.

now Simon wasn't like everybody else. he was a leper.

lepers weren't looked too highly on in the society Jesus lived in.

in fact. they were completely rejected and outcast. they had no place. no value.

a leper was certainly not someone you would picture a king spending their last moments with. much less the King that is above every king. but Jesus didn't go along with what was socially acceptable or normal. so there we find Him - at the house of a leper.

a leper wasn't allowed to be part of society. they didn't approach anyone who was "normal".

Luke 17:12 -- "As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance and called out in a loud voice, 'Jesus, Master, have pity on us!'"

they knew they couldn't approach Jesus because they were unclean. so they called out to him. from a distance.

they called Jesus from a distance because they were scared of being rejected. everyone else had rejected them. people couldn't see past their disease.

but Jesus could.

so Jesus approached them. He took the first steps towards them. to touch them and make them clean.

Jesus cleansed the lepers. They were outcasts in society. People probably told them on a daily basis, with words or simply with actions, that they weren't good enough to be part of society, that they were revolting, filthy and dirty. People were scared to be around them out of fear that they would catch their disease.

Jesus, however, was not scared to be around these men and women.

when society said, "filthy"- Jesus looked at them, touched them, and said "clean".

He called out who they were and what He saw in them. He looked past their wounds, scars, and the flesh falling off of their body and He saw what they were made for.

people may talk. but God imparts healing and identity to those that society labels as worthless.

we are all like lepers.

only our wounds aren't manifested in flesh falling off of our bodies.

our would and problems are internal matters of the heart.

our sin. our past mistakes. our experiences that left us broken and dirty. they are all like leprosy. if they are left untreated, they will fester and grow and take over your life. 

Jesus is not scared of our humanity or our sin disease.

unlike the people who cast out lepers from society out of fear of catching their disease. Jesus touches, embraces and cleanses their and our diseases. He knows that the power inside of Him is so much greater than the power of any disease, sin or death that we could be carrying around.

so we go back to Jesus and Simon.

Jesus is in the house of a leper. reclining. sharing a meal with him. laughing. sharing stories. teaching. listening to Simon's heart. telling jokes. embracing Simon's humanity. not hiding from it.

in society, Simon was known as "Simon the Leper". to Jesus- he was just Simon. no labels.

Jesus accepted the "unacceptable" and loved the "unlovable".

enter - the infamous "woman" who interrupted their meal .

who is this woman?

no one really knows. but from my thoughts and reading, as best I can tell, she was a woman named Mary Magdalene. a woman whom Jesus cast 7 demons out of . a woman caught in adultery. a prostitute.

a "sinner". when the people in the Bible call someone a "sinner"- they are literally calling them a dog. a reject. an outcast. a virus to be avoided.

so, enter- sinner.

the fact that she was a "sinner" might be less or equally as controversial as the fact that she was a woman.


public, societal like was dominated by men in Jesus' day.

women were forbidden from socially interacting with men. they were confined to their domestic lives.

women were suspects of lust and sexual sin when they interacted with men. it was always the woman's fault if the man thought lustful thoughts when he saw her. if he raped her- it was her fault for being beautiful. if she had sex before she was married, by law she could be stoned.

the point is- women were not valued in this society.

not only were they devalued, they were controversial.

and Jesus loved them.

He invested in them.

He spoke with them.

in public.

He touched them.

He allowed them to follow Him and be His disciples.

He valued women.

Jesus was the best thing that ever happened to women.

so this woman with a "sinner" reputation and past enters Simon's house. unannounced. uninvited.

her presence forced them to look at her. to acknowledge her. 

Luke 14:3 - "...a woman came with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, made of pure nard. She broke the jar and poured the perfume on His head."

imagine the scene.

a woman walk in. the men stir. most of them thinking, "what is she doing here?"

they watch as she breaks open the jar.

the smell of nard fills the air.

(doesn't nard just sound like it smells awesome? i don't think so either. but it was the best perfume around back then.)

 they watch, wondering what she is doing.

she doesn't take a couple drops to put on Jesus' forehead.

no, no. she dumps the entire bottle of perfume onto His head.

imagine the smell. how sweet it must have been. the intoxicating aroma filling the air.

like when you come home from a long day of school and your mom has made chocolate chip cookies and the smell fills the entire house.

immediate criticism matches her extravagant act of love.

vs. 4 - "Some of those present were saying indignantly to one another, 'Why this waste of perfume? It could have been sold for more than a  year's wages and the money given to the poor.' And they rebuked her harshly." 

this wasn't any perfume. it was an inheritance. it was an entire year's wages. it was worth money.

but this woman loved Jesus so much that she was willing to give everything that she had to show her love.

the men there were thinking she was a fool. with society's view of women, they probably thought she was trying to seduce Jesus. this humble, loving act was being seen as wrong as sinful.

what was the woman thinking about as she was pouring her perfume and heart onto Jesus?

if this woman was indeed the same woman caught in adultery, i imagine she was thinking about the moment Jesus extended love to her and forgave her when everyone else condemned her.

the story tells us that she was caught in the act of adultery.

she was caught having sex with a man who wasn't her husband.

so the self-righteous pharisees ripped her from bed and dragged her to the temple, where Jesus was teaching.

they throw her on the ground in front of him.

she's probably naked. maybe having a sheet to cover herself with.

shameful.

vulnerable.

weak.

afraid.

Jesus kneels down beside her and gently begins to draw in the dirt.

He doesn't answer their condemning words saying they have the right, according to law, to stone her.

still drawing, He says - "If any of you is without sin, you throw the first stone."

He keeps drawing.

one at a time, the pharisees drop their rocks and walk away.

they all disappear.

John 8:10- "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" - He asked her, kindly.

she lifts her head up. looks around. through tears she says- "No one, sir."

Jesus, tender and gentle, speaks to her heart. "Then neither do I condemn you. Go now, and sin no more." (vs. 11)

as Mary is pouring this ointment on Jesus' head, perhaps she is remembering how it felt...

to be forgiven.

to be given value.

to have her shame taken away.

the grace.

the compassion.

the love.

the honor.

the tenderness.

the moment Jesus lifted her head, looked her in the eyes, and said -"you are not condemned. you are forgiven. you are loved. you are treasured. you are valued."

the silence.

no more oppressors.

only grace.

only compassion.

only acceptance.

overwhelming love.

through her anointing of Jesus, with her most prized possession- she is returning to Him the extravagant love that He poured out on her. not out of duty. but in response to His love. the law condemned her. Jesus loved her and empowered her to change and be free.

love abolished sin in her life.

and love can abolish sin in our lives too.

Luke 7:47 - "I tell you- her many sins have been forgiven, for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little, loves little."

she who has been forgiven much, loves much.

this woman was about to be stoned to death. but Jesus extended grace and forgiveness. and she was forever changed.

the condemning voices at this dinner table were familiar to her. she had been condemned her whole life.

but Jesus, once again, released love into her and affirmed her.

Mark 14:6-9 -- "Leave her alone." said Jesus. "Why are you bothering her? She has done a beautiful thing to me....She did all that she could. She poured perfume on my body beforehand to prepare for my burial. I tell you the truth, wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her."

today. roughly 2000 years later. her story of extravagant love is still being told.

Jesus wasn't offended by her sin. He wasn't uncomfortable by the fact that she was an adulteress. The fact that she was probably a prostitute didn't put her in the "unlovable" category for Him.

much like the leper, Jesus was not scared of this woman's humanity.

He saw her beauty and loved the extravagant love and worship that she offered Him.

He didn't see her as dirty and defiled, a throw away that had been used by dozens upon dozens of men.

He saw a captivating princess that His Father created.

Jesus won her affection and all of His love and affection was for her.

daughter.

sister.

friend.

woman.

worthy.

valued.

honored in His sight.

she wasn't remembered as the "prostitute". or the "sinner". or the "adulterer". or the "stupid woman who wasted a year's wages."

what was a "waste" to men- Jesus saw as infinite value.

she was remembered for her love.

this is a story about worth. about value. about worthiness.

it forces us to question the paradox of reality?

Simon is a leper.

is he clean or unclean? society calls him filthy. Jesus calls him clean.

Mary is a prostitute.

is she a sinner or is her sin no more? Jesus calls her pure.

The perfume was extremely valuable and was used to anoint Jesus.

was it a "waste" or was in the most beautiful worship we have ever seen? Jesus called it worship. Love.

What the world labels as "dirty. worthless. unclean. sinful." - Jesus sees value in.

its typical of Jesus to stir up controversy and go against what society calls "normal".

but the fact is that Jesus was fully God, fully man- and He was not afraid of our humanity.

and He is not afraid of yours.

in fact, He embraces our humanity.

He takes what the world calls "trash"- and He creates art.

Ephesians 2:20 - "For we are his masterpiece. Created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which he prepared in advance for us to do."

this is a story about a loving Savior that came to draw the world unto Himself with nothing but love.

the law could never do what Jesus did for these two people.

the law could never heal Simon of his leprosy.

the law could never call a prostitute beautiful, loved and forgiven.

the law could never call a "waste" of inheritance "worship". 

this was the work of love.

this was the work of grace.

this was the legacy of Jesus.

He takes what others call "trash" and He calls it treasure.

You are not trash. You are His treasure.